Ok, so we talked about forgiveness…now let’s think about the power and blessing of a sincere apology.
Man alive is it hard to apologize without wanting to add in the three letter word…but.
But nothing. An apology has nothing to do with us needing validation, being right, or proving a point further.
Needing to be right, unwilling to apologize, refusing to forgive from the heart, and being adamant about things being done your way…is not only prideful, it has nothing to do with love.
Love seeks out the good in others and…
Months ago, I spoke about how love wills the good for others. Thus, God is love. He wills the good for each of us, every single day. Even when it doesn’t feel like it, look like it, or end up how we want it. He is working all things out for our good and ultimately His glory.
An apology from the heart goes a long way.
It tells the other person you value them above the situation.
It tells the other person you care about them enough to lay down your pride.
Our example is Jesus…who laid down His life for us willingly. He accepted the apology of the thief on the cross, that He was holding together, and brought him to paradise.
When you apologize, be sure it is done in love…not out of resentment, bitterness, or because you want to show the other person you did the right thing and they did not. Do it out of love.
Love covers a multitude of sins.
When our children must apologize to one another, they will do it until it is done correctly and from the heart. They are asked to hug the person that they hurt or offended. Often they will pray together and for each other. Who better to cover their sins, then the creator of LOVE!
When we apologize from the heart, it opens the window of God’s grace to overflow. It separates pain from truth and allows the heart to welcome love once again.
An apology is another gift we give ourselves and the one who is receiving our sincerest words of love.
I am sorry.
You mean more to me than…
Now, before we go any further…an empty apology is simply sin disguised in goodness.
Apologizing and then committing the same thing again, really wasn’t an apology at all.
To say I’m sorry, means I am turning away from, will resist, won’t do it again.
The hard part becomes forgiving the same offense over and over again. Trust me as a mom of nine, I’m put to the test on this one daily. Then I remember how many times God, has so graciously forgiven me, and thankfully will never stop!!!! I simply must humble myself and bring my sins to Him and chose to sin no more.
We are instructed in the bible:
Matthew 18:22-23 says, “Then Peter came and said to Him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”
Matthew 7:24 says, “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.”
Remember this…
All of our actions are before the Lord, nothing goes unseen and He tests the motives of our hearts. Whether we are forgiving or seeking forgiveness, let us be sure it is done in love.
The beauty of all of this is that…
If He is so gracious to freely forgive our sins, shouldn’t we too be quick to forget the sins of others, and have hope in the goodness of God to work in others? Should we not be quick to apology to ensure we are in good standing with God, and man?
Sometimes, the apology may not be enough and reaping painful consequences will follow, but don’t give up hope in the goodness of God to work all things out for your good, and His glory. Some how. Some way. It all works out. It always will. It always does. Whether you see it this side of heaven or not. God’s plans are for good and not evil.
Pondering this and other deep truths…
Here’s to speaking the truth in love and praying it inspires you to do the same.
I’m sorry. You are forgiven. I love you more…(and if you are my MIL – I love YOU MOST, for all ETERNITY!)
4 Friend's Thoughts:
I love this post... just the simple basis lately of love and forgiveness.... And meaning it from the heart.
I remember growing up and learning that when someone apologizes, we are to say "you're forgiven" even if we didn't think the apology was sincere because it was more important for us to keep bitterness from our hearts, especially when we wouldn't do anything about anyone else's heart or motivations. And saying "its ok" isn't always true... most likely what happened wasn't ok, but we will forgive anyway!
And so true... if I pray and expect Jesus to always love and forgive me, how can I not do that for others? I don't have to like the bad choices and pain from others, but its still my responsibility to love and forgive as I have been. Easy to say, not always easy to do.... Thank God we are always forgiven!
thank you for yet again sharing the truth in love and so clearly!
love you!
chell
This was a good one! I'm currently in the midst of a situation where I had to apologize in hopes that it would lead to restoration in a relationship, even though the division occured because of the other person's actions. It's been several weeks since my apology and I'm still waiting for a reply. I've had to daily lay down my "need" to be right and ask God to give me the strength to forgive even though my feelings are hurt. I'm so thankful that I love a God who is in the business of doing miracles and am anticipating him doing great things to restore a broken relationship.
You're so right. People tend to add that ...but. It is so hard to love when your heart is filled with anger and unforgiveness towards others. I finally realized that each person will be accountable to God. So instead of thinking it was up to me to change them, I left it to the Lord who sees all and knows all. And He alone can see into another's heart. I cannot know the motives that lie behind it all. So I forgive.
So glad you take on topics like this Jill.
Love you,
Debbie
Jill, where is that verse found the verses with the heart? vs 17&18? Praying for you today.....hugs!
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